i just had to

i saw this on a friends facebook, and i had to post it again. it's all bout home for me.

1. That farm boy standing next to the feed bin did more
work before breakfast than you do all week at the gym.

2. It's called a "gravel road." No matter how slow you
drive, you're going to get dust on your Navigator. I have a four
wheel drive because I need it. Drive it or get it out of the way.

3. We all started hunting and fishing when we were seven
years old. Yeah, we saw Bambi. We got over it.

4. Any references to "corn fed" when talking about our
women will get you whipped...by our women.

5. Go ahead and bring your $600 Orvis Fly Rod. Don't cry to
us if a flathead catfish breaks it off at the handle. We have a
name for those little trout you fish for...bait.

6. Pull your pants up. You look like an idiot.

7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of mallards are making their final approach, we will shoot it. You might hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.

8. No, there's no "Vegetarian Special" on the menu. Order
steak. Or, you can order the Chef's Salad and pick
off the two pounds of ham and turkey.

9. You bring coke into my house, it better be brown, wet,
and served over ice.

10. So you have a sixty-thousand dollar car you drive on
weekends. We're real impressed. We have quarter of a million
dollar combines (x 2) that we use two weeks a year.

11. Let's get this straight. We have one stoplight in town.
We stop when it's red. We may even stop when it's yellow.

12. Our women hunt, fish, drive trucks, tractors, and 4 wheelers--because they
want to. So, you're a feminist from the city. Isn't that cute.

13. Yeah, we eat catfish. Carp, too--and turtle. You really
want sushi and caviar? It's available at the bait shop.

14. They are pigs and cows. That's what they smell like. Get over
it. Don't like it? Interstates 70, 80, 64, 74 go two
ways--Interstates 55 & 57 go the other two. Pick one and use it
accordingly.

15. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season.
It's a religious holiday. You can get breakfast at the church.

16. So every person in every pickup waves. It's called
being friendly. Understand the concept?

17. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit in the water
hazard. It spooks the fish.

18. That Highway Patrol Officer that just pulled you over
for driving like an idiot? His name is "Sir" -no matter how old he is

19. Collars of shirts are meant to be folded down, refer to number 6 to see what you look like!